I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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