He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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