i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
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