Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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