You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
