I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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