You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
