Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
