I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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