ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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