Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
