You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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