I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
this just has baby written all over it
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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