I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
he fucked my hip out of place.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
