Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize