I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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