I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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