I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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