just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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