walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
