didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
