i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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