your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
