physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Randomize
