i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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