Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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