Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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