so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
