All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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