New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Randomize