i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize