I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
