i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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