i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Randomize
