so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
