Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
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