I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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