he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
