At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize
