we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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