He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
We have started to decorate penises.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
