We should be called the Road Head Warriors
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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