You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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