i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
