dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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