She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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