Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
dude. I can hear the air.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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