Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
