I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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