no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
